With regards to women, I have tried

Being chivalrous
Being romantic
Being macho
Being incredibly cool and laid back
Being sensitive and attentive
Being a bastard
Stalking
Ignorance
Writing letters
Chatting online
Phone calls
E-mails
Talking openly and honestly
Lying
Dancing
Singing
Being who I am
Being the sort of person I hate
Romantic gestures
Fighting
Playing sports
Being nerdy
Being dim
Being intelligent
Arguing and being stubborn
Being weak and giving in
Letting the competition win
Meeting halfway
Pretended to be interested in the same things
Actually being interested in the same things
Begging
Being forceful
Being exactly who they want
Being exactly who they think they want

All of these things, though not all at the same time, obviously. With several women. I have still had no luck. I must be ugly. (B3ta)